


The Aux Cord Fic

by Malaayna



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: And just kinda went nuts with, Canon Compliant, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Kinda a crack fic?, Proud emo keef, This came from a post I commented on on tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 13:21:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11556057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Malaayna/pseuds/Malaayna
Summary: This is defo a crack fic which came about when I commented on a tumblr post from riceisgood123And then we kinda went mental with it lolSo hereHave this weird shit





	The Aux Cord Fic

Lance walked into the lounge area to find Pidge and Hunk well on the way to hyperventilation, both laughing so hard.  
"What's got you two nearly catatonic?" He asked.  
Pidge took a few deep breaths, trying to compose herself.  
She nearly achieved it too, that was until she looked up at Lance and promptly lost it again, a half hack-half wheeze forcing it's way out of her throat.  
She shakes her head, still wheezing, and calls Lance over with a wave.  
Hunk has already passed laughing, having plummeted headfirst into silent rocking, tears streaming down his cheeks.  
Lance, extremely curious now, takes the offered headphones from Pidge and puts them on.  
It's not long till he's joined the other two in hysterics. 

\--------------------

"Keith, buddy, you, *wheeze* you gotta *gulp* you gotta come to the lounge *snort* holy fuck......" says Lance's amused voice over the intercom in the training room.  
"End training sequence," Keith says to the bot, wiping his wet hair away from his eyes.  
'Well', he thought to himself, 'Lance sounded like he was struggling against laughter, not enemies, so it cant be anything too bad'.  
'Doesn't mean I'm not curious though', he adds, picking up his jacket and heads out.

\--------------

He can hear the laughter even before he reaches the lounge room door.  
Really intrigued now, he slides his hand over the control pad, watching as the door opens.

The sight that welcomes him is this; Lance and Pidge in a writhing, giggling pile on the floor; Allura and Shiro leaning against each other, wheezing and crying; and Hunk trying to help a hysterical Coran catch a breath.

It's not even a full second later that Lance looks up, like a vwry disheveled meerkat, at Keith's arrival.

"Keith!! Fuck, dude, my man, my guy, holy fucking shit you HAVE to listen to this!!!" Lance exclaims, the words barreling out at breakneck speed as he jumps up, vaults over the sofa and proceeds to drag Keith to the chairs.

"Okay, so," he begins, beaming like the cat that got the cream, "Pidge was hacking into the Galra radios, yeah,"  
"Like you do," Pidge interjects, lying on the floor, staring up at the roof.  
"Like you do," Hunk and Lance parrot.  
"Anyway," Lance continues, flailing his hand at Pidge, who passes her laptop over.  
"Anyway, she was hacking into it, ya know, seeing if there was any shit we could use yeah,"

Keith nods, rolling his hand in a gesture to try to make Lance spit out whatever he was trying to say.  
"And, she," Lance wheezes again, "she, oh holy fuck.." he stops to breathe.  
"Just fuckin listen to what she found," he finally croaks out, pressing 'play' on the audio file.  
The castle starts translating immediately.

"Reports say that at every encounter with Voltron so far," began the deep voice of a Galran woman, "since approximately 40 quintents ago, the Blue Paladin has started playing, what we can only assume are human war chants, from the speakers on his lion,"

Keith is struggling to hold his mirth down when Lance mouths "wait" at him, grinning with eyebrows raised.

The recording continues, "we also have reports that the Red Paladin, whilst engaged in close combat fighting, has actually started chanting along with the recording. We haven't been able to translate it all, our software seemingly unable to, but one phrase that seems to be repeated quite often sounds like,"   
She cleared her throat, and started reciting, slowly, in a calm voice, "Thiz aiy-ent ahh zeen, iz ahh garrrrd dare arr ray."

Now, she may have said more after this, but Keith wouldn't have heard it as, everyone in the room, him included, simultaneously began cackling and howling like a pack of hyenas.

**Author's Note:**

> Please don't judge me too much lol


End file.
